I Never Thought of It That Way: How to Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Times

Guzmán examines how to achieve genuine understanding in conversations across divides. She argues that clear communication requires both curiosity and honesty to ensure mutual comprehension. She emphasizes that each person views the world through a unique lens shaped by individual experiences and values. While this diversity creates opportunities for dialogue, it also presents challenges in conveying meaning accurately across differences.

To demonstrate effective communication techniques, Guzmán describes an exercise from communications consultants Peter Myers and Robert Baedeker. Participants asked each other about personal problems, requiring careful listening and restatement until achieving complete understanding. Through this example, Guzmán illustrates how rare it is for people to feel truly heard.

The author presents practical strategies for ensuring clear communication, including “following through” by restating what one has heard and allowing the speaker to correct misunderstandings. Drawing from her journalism experience, Guzmán emphasizes how clarification prevents harm, recounting how misunderstandings in her early career negatively impacted a business owner she interviewed.

The chapter addresses loaded terminology through an example from 2021 between two women—Wynette Sills and Vera—discussing voter rights and abortion. Their exchange revealed how terms used to name issues can reflect partisan perspectives and obstruct understanding. By examining their different interpretations of phrases like “voter rights” and “Jim Crow 2.